Omegle: Habla con un b/tard, con un alemán bicéfalo, o con tu puta madre.

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NSBM

RangoVeterano
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Hace unos días, los hijos de puta de 4Chan se divierten de una manera novedosa. Una página que, en vista de los loles que puede llegar a dar, me he visto en la obligación moral de trasladar aquí.
Si tienen english level de primaria o superior, prepárense para algunas de las conversaciones más surrealistas que hayan mantenido desde aquellos posts de los años mozos de Rulo.
Les presento...

OMEGLE.COM

Procedo a elaborarles un FAQ casero para extender el LOL por terrenos extranjeros.

- ¿Qué coño es Omegle?
Es una página wec tan sencilla que incluso Mono de Michigan podría entenderla. Nos permite iniciar una conversación aleatoria con un desconocido al azar de los miles que se conectan a las redes Omegle.
Tenemos un 75% de posibilidades de que el tipo en cuestión sea un asiduo de 4Chan; un 15% de que sea un garrulo buscando que le calienten la polla; un 4,5 % de que sea un shemalote y un 0,5% de que sea una mujer.
En cualquier caso, el intercambio de sandeces etílico-surrealistas está prácticamente asegurado.

- ¿Cómo uso Omegle?
Le damos al botón azul gordo que reza "Start a chat". Comenzamos a hablar de lo que nos salga de la polla. Si nos aburrimos, pulsamos en "Disconnect" y automáticamente se nos procurará la opción de iniciar una nueva conversación.

- ¿Es Omegle anónimo?
Por supuesto. Ni tan siquiera te permite escoger un nick. Las conversaciones siempre se desarrollarán entre "You" (Tú), y "Stranger" (El mongui con el que intercambies frases).

- ¿Es Omegle trolleable por PL?
100%
Para ser justos, Omegle posee una superpoblación de Trolls, más divertido si cabe, al iniciar una cruenta guerra entre los trolls b/tards súcnors y los inteligentes y despiadados trolls de PL. :lol:

- ¿Por qué debería probar Omegle?
Porque ofrece una opción perfecta contra el aburrimiento, y porque es el complemento perfecto para esperar a completar cursillos de Mendigogame si ya te duelen los ojos de ver LOST.


Y para terminar, os dejo la primera perla de la tarde:

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: HOW DO I TURNED OFF CAPS LOCK???

You: I think you are retard, no way

Stranger: WAT

You: I think you are retard and, also, you don't know how to read

You: so you are a complete asshole dumbass

Stranger: I THINK YOU'RE AN ARROGANT FUCK

Stranger: GRADUATE HIGH SCHOOL THEN KILL YOURSELF

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

or save this log or send us feedback.
Que el Lol esté con ustedes.
 
tiene opcion para enseñar el rabo por la webcam? le veo exito y seria interesante si se pudieran ver tetas claro.
 
Stranger: 春哥纯爷们

You: No.

Stranger: NO?

Stranger: 铁血真汉子

You: Ah, ahora sí.

You: Un beso para ti también.

Stranger: 哦

Stranger: 我懂

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:shock:

Edito:
Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Que dificil es hacer amigos aqui...


Stranger: hi
You: he

You: que pasa chavalada!!!!!

Stranger: hola

You: dejarme en passssss

You: pasopalabra

Stranger: pardon

Stranger: je ne suis parle pas espanol

You: pasalacabra

You: eres frances?

Stranger: 22 m egypt . u????

Stranger: im from egypt

You: yo soy gordo

Stranger: not french or english

You: no, pherseo

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hey
You: are you alive?
Stranger: yes
You: funny
Stranger: from?
You: I am trying to talk to the dead
Stranger: how old?
You: 22
Stranger: oh
You: oh?
Stranger: you r younger
You: then I am 35
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
c6152a2b5230094d0642f6f551366bceo.jpg


EDITO:

85db6bfbb55e2a429815ac46015321c7o.jpg


Y ya me aburrí de esta mierda.
 
Stranger: chun ge
You: whot

You: amo emo lol cheese?

Stranger: cheese?

You: not only cheese

Stranger: chun ge!!!!!!!

You: amo emo lol cheese

You: don't you understand the difference?

Stranger: no

Stranger: “?”?

You: amo = boss

You: emo = chemical romance

You: lol = you

You: cheese = cheese

You: do you follow me?

Stranger: sorry

Stranger: 春哥纯爷们
:lol::lol:
 
Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

You: Va, seamos amigos.

Stranger: como vai voce?

You: qué se supone que es eso? italiano?

Stranger: no portequse

Stranger: are u italian?

You: no, are you?

Stranger: noo

Stranger: ı m from turkey...

Stranger: U?

You: Spain

Stranger: ovwwwwvv Spain

You: what´s the matter?

You: do u hate Spain for some reason?

Stranger: no

You: oh, maybe u don´t know "ovwwwwvv" is like "go fuck the smelly cunt of your grandma" in spanish
Stranger: no

Stranger: ı like spain

Stranger: do you know Daniel Guiza?

You: yes, he´s a gitano

You: Fenerbache or something like that, isn´t it?

Stranger: haha this good

Stranger: my team fenerbahçe

You: didn´t you defeated Sevilla two years ago?

Stranger: yeess

You: and you say it proudly? I´m a Sevilla supporter

Stranger: really?

You: yes

You: my father died after this match, heart attack

Stranger: nooo

You: yes

You: and now you´re smiling and celebrating his death

Stranger: really?I 'm sorry

You: I know you´re not guilty, but understand me

Stranger: ı understand....

Stranger: your name?

You: Inocencio III, yours?

Stranger: encantado de conocerle Inocencio

Stranger: my name is Kemal...

You: hi Kemal

You: are you cristian?

Stranger: noo

Stranger: but cristian or muslim

Stranger: What does it matter?

Stranger: ??

You: well, when Roma sends the Santa Cruzada again, you´ll want to be a good catholic

Stranger: haha noo

You: Deus Vult

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Stranger: do you know Daniel Guiza?

You: yes, he´s a gitano
Que hijo de lol.

Pues menuda roña, la gent que me encuentro no tienen lol y 9 de cada 10 dice que son de china, y china ta muy lejos, y aunque las chinitas me molan, no tienen tetas. :(
 
NSBM rebuznó:

- ¿Qué coño es Omegle?
Es una página wec tan sencilla que incluso Mono de Michigan podría entenderla.


¿Le conozco de algo?


EDITO: jódete, no sé cómo funciona.
 
El día que vuelva el irc se caga la perra...

Yo alucino, de verdad :sad:
 
Stranger: hi

You: HI

Stranger: from?

You: w r u from?

You: spain

Stranger: china

Stranger: male

You: fucking chink

You: all you must die

Your conversational partner has disconnected.


me encanta este sitio
 
Stranger: hey
You: i will rape you

Stranger: ok
You: open your anus

Stranger: i havnt got a anus
You: snail?

Stranger: yeah
You: do u want to suck my dick, snail?


..........Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:lol:
 
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: hi

Stranger: where are you from

You: wanna fight with my pikachu lv 40?

You: from spain and you?

Stranger: korea ;

Stranger: south of..

You: :o do you have nuclear weapons?

Stranger: no

Stranger: that is

Stranger: have north korea

Stranger: i live in south korea

You: ups, true true

You: you are in the good side man

You: how old are you? male?

Stranger: 16 f .

Stranger: and you?

You: 17 f

Stranger: ahah

Stranger: hi hi

You: :)

You: tell me stuff of 16 f ;)

Stranger: stjff?

Stranger: what?

You: do you have a nice couple of breast?

Stranger: hahahaha

Stranger: not

You: pic.

You: or make a picture with the ascii characters

You: fuck up, all chinese people are gay

Stranger: hahaha

Stranger: you

You: im still waiting for you :(

Stranger: no

You: im writing with one hand :)

Stranger: 병신아 씨발 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

or save this log or send us feedback.
 
You: hi
Stranger: u are a robot?
Stranger: I know .yes you are

You: yea
You: im a fukin robot come to the future
You: to restore CCCP

Stranger: when u would to change to a real human
Stranger: to be human .it is more interest
You: when i find my VAGINA

Stranger: they give u body but not soul .sorry
Stranger: u can not understand our thinking
Stranger: different world
You: thats racist!

Stranger: hha
Stranger: my english so poor ,sorry

You:
where are you from?
Stranger: china

You: poor country poor english.

.........Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Haciendo amigos over the world. :lol:
 
No hay forma de entenderse, no hay manera. :53

You: ¿ʞɔ!ɹʇ ʎɯ ʍoʞu noʎ op 'ɥʇƃ!ɹ ||ɐ

Stranger: hi

Stranger: what?

You: ¿ʞɔ!ɹʇ ʎɯ ʍoʞu noʎ op 'ɥʇƃ!ɹ ||ɐ

Stranger: 我操

You: no

You: ¿ʞɔ!ɹʇ ʎɯ ʍoʞu noʎ op 'ɥʇƃ!ɹ ||ɐ

Stranger: 啊?

You: ¿ʞɔ!ɹʇ ʎɯ ʍoʞu noʎ op 'ɥʇƃ!ɹ ||ɐ

Stranger: 你傻逼?

You: ¿ʞɔ!ɹʇ ʎɯ ʍoʞu noʎ op 'ɥʇƃ!ɹ ||ɐ

Edito: :lol:


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: 春哥??
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
Stranger: you don't
Stranger: fuck you'
You:
Hi, I'm great Mazinger z can change your life today!
Stranger: i don't like you
You: I need you to send tungsten to live!
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
Stranger: no nono
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
Stranger: you?
You: are five young and robot
Stranger: young
Stranger: you like sex?
You: command command g g nobody can stop!
Stranger: oyea
You:
Chanquete is dead, tell pancho
You: you know...
Stranger: do you like linkin park?
You: do you nkow lina morgan freeman?
You: *know
You: lina
You: morgan
You: freema
You: freeman
Stranger: yes
You: the best actreess
Stranger: lina morgan freeman
You: oh, yes?
Stranger: blace eye?
You: hat movie do you prefer, human?
Stranger: Black eye bean bean like?
Stranger: hat movie yes
You:
I expirementar first sex with humans, you know where it?
Stranger: where?
You: on earth
Stranger: i want know
You: ???
Stranger: Mars ?
You:
I am a robot from a million light years

You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
You: I need to live tungsten, tungsten
Stranger: UFO?
Stranger: your email?
You: I'm from another solar system, we intercepted the signal from your primitive internet to have sex with young Earthlings
Stranger: ni know sex??
You:
help us and be rewarded with the honor of heroes

You:
where are you from?
Stranger: I come from the black hole
You:
this is very serious, please take it if you try to laugh at another who wants to be a hero
Stranger: From Mars
You:
earthling not you?
Stranger: no
Stranger: on the Mars
You:
then I'm not interested, I need earthlings, get lucky.

intergalactic memories
You: bye
You: bip
You: bip
You: bye
Stranger: wait
Stranger: wait
You: need tungtane
Stranger: i can help you
You: I can only speak with earthlings

Stranger: You have anything to give me ?
You:
I have a message
You: for the people of the land
You: of the earth
Stranger: You want to destroy the Earth?
You: not
You: we want SAVE the eatrh
Stranger: SAVE me?
Stranger: i'm phone 911?
You:
no, i tell you what do
Stranger: tell me
You:
to be saved sent to the tungsten coordinates according to the treaty agreed in Burma, everything is marked in a cornfield in lepe
Stranger: if i can help you I will be honored that very much
You:
you will be rewarded if you help us
You: but you have to go out in the media to spread the message
Stranger: ok I help you with every effort
You: around the world must know that their lives are in danger
Stranger: what reward?
You:
lepe is in the key, go to lepe and asked for the great picón
Stranger: I remembered
You: they will know what to do, now I must leave the intergalactic peace be with you, unless you're Asian, does not support them will die first.
You: see you soon
Stranger: i hate Asian
You:
well this is the way and your place in the second mission will have to do with them and disappeared for the purification of the World
You: ok
You: bye
Stranger: bye
You:
see u when the tungsten
Stranger: I remembered you'
 
Alucinante, es como la vida real...

Stranger: hey

You: hi

You: tengo ladillas como centollos

Stranger: age?

You: do you like ladillas como centollos?

Stranger: wnhat does thst mean?

You: I'm a mexican wey

You: all mexican have ladillas

You: and centollos

Stranger: do you believe destiny brought us two together?

You: like centollos

Stranger: im female

You: i'm shemale

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
No solo está lleno de chinos y coreanos, esta lleno de chinos y coreanos MARICONES!!!

Stranger: hi

You: hi

You: te puedes escanear las tetas?

Stranger: what?

You: boys have penis, girls have pussy and your mother have both. What do you have?

Stranger: i am a man

Stranger: i am from china

You: so you are a little man not a man

Stranger: yes

Stranger: i am 18

Stranger: you?

You have disconnected.
 
Memento rebuznó:
No solo está lleno de chinos y coreanos, esta lleno de chinos y coreanos MARICONES!!!

Stranger: hi

You: hi

You: te puedes escanear las tetas?

Stranger: what?

You: boys have penis, girls have pussy and your mother have both. What do you have?

Stranger: i am a man

Stranger: i am from china

You: so you are a little man not a man

Stranger: yes

Stranger: i am 18

Stranger: you?

You have disconnected.

Joder, prometia, tenias que haber seguido, hijo del Mao
 
un chino que se deja humillar en la segunda frase puede dar mucho LOL pero se le veia demasiado la pluma y no quiero alimentar la paja de algun amarillo...

Pero ostia, esto es una mina si consigues enganchar a alguno....

Connecting to server...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!


Stranger: i love you (:

You: i love you honey bunny

Stranger: my life is average

You: why dont you try jump from a bridge?

Stranger: why? i dont want to die, i just want to find someone special

You: www.putalocura.com you can log in, there are some nice persons who can help you

Stranger: help me? how?

You: you can talk about your problems and a psycologist will help you for free, no money, you just have to send him a photo.

Stranger: a photo of mine? why?

You: because they use a therapy called BUKKAKE.

Strange: wtf is this therapy? it sounds like food...

You: yes, you need to be hungry, you are going to eat a lot of NABOS

Strange: Nabos? what are you talking about?

You: oh... sorry, you dont understand spanish... i can explain you with this question...

You: 3 + 2 = ??

Strange: 5

You: POR EL CULO TE LA HINCO


Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Connecting to server...

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!

Stranger: h

Stranger: i

You: hio

You: i am girl 19 yr old and yu?

Stranger: 23yr old guy

Stranger: So, you get to ask me 3 questions

Stranger: about anything

You: yes

Stranger: and i'll answer them truthfully

You: ok

Stranger: So, make em good! I'll answer ANYTHING honestly

You: okko

You: do you like ladillas?

Stranger: whats a ladilla?

You: ladillas como centollos, no?

Stranger: ahhh

Stranger: crab?

Stranger: ahh

Stranger: no

Stranger: nonono

You: mmm

You: similar

Stranger: hm

Stranger:
................................................ ..........................._,-~"¯¯"~-,
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:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::\ .............."~--„_____„„-~~

You: Torbe know?

Your conversational partner has disconnected.
 
Stranger: jhi

Stranger: from where r u?

You: buenas tardes caballero

You: I'm from Nigeria. I'm a niggah, man!

Stranger: m or f?

Stranger: ?

You: hybrid. i've penis but i have got really huge tits too


Stranger: ??

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Esto del Omegle da un poco de asquete, solo hay personajillos buscando nenas.
 
You: hola chupacipotes

You: hi

Stranger: 恩

Stranger: hi

You: are you from japan

You: ?

Stranger: no

Stranger: china

You: do you know what "chupacipotes" is?

You: is good person in my idiom

You: ahh, china

You: im from spain

Stranger: chupacipotes?

You: yes, i think you are a chupacipotes

Stranger: why?

You: is coloquial

You: i don´t know, it´s a feeling

Stranger: oh

Stranger: i like spain

You: if you think you are not, no problem, ok

You: me too, haha

You: i have neb¡ver been in china

Stranger: Hola Soy un chino

You: but we have a lot of your products

You: hola chino

Stranger: right?

You: yes

You: google traductor??

You: haha

Stranger: Sorry that I will only Spanish

You: mandarino?

You: or capuchino

You: ?

You: i have problems to know the diference

Stranger: Madrid is so beautiful city

You: I dont like it, there is a lot of chinese restaurants

You: i dont like the dogs

Stranger: oh where are you from?

You: from barcelona

You: we are like polands

Stranger: wow

You: or gipsis, i don´t, know

You: the gipsy kings

Stranger: i like barcelona than madrid

You: where are you

You: from

You: ?

Stranger: shanghai

You: oh,

Stranger: you konw?

You: so you are gay

You: yes

You: is the chinese gay heaven

You: dont?

Stranger: and... just a moment ago why dont you come up with chinese first?


You: maricón y tal

Stranger: Longing Barcelona Cathedral

You: are you a roboc?

You: an internec roboc

Stranger: what?

You: yes, ladillas como centollos roboc from internec; dont you know?

Stranger: oh

You: oh what

Stranger: I have heard In front of Barcelona Cathedral There have a faucet

Connection asploded.
 
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